Discrimination or Incompetence?

             Ok, I would like to get something figured out. It is driving me mad.   I have in the course of Feisty Pants' life, come up against an odd behavior time and time again.  For no reason that I can figure out.  It's this phenomenon:  I try to order something, usually paid and/or reimbursed by her insurance.  (Read that as no question it will get paid for.)  But when I attempt to order/purchase  it, I get the complete runaround.  I don't mean they just refuse.  There are plenty of medical supply companies out there.  I can always go to the next supplier.  I mean they intentionally stonewall me so I cannot get even get a simple yes or no.

              First, there was the durable medical goods company that I tried to order medical equipment from when FP was small.  Things we knew would get paid for.  There are several funding streams for paying for equipment for disabled children. If her main insurance will not pay, other options are often available.  All we need is a yes or no from the insurance.   It's just a matter of filling the right forms on the medical supply company's part.  We waited for a year while the company kept telling us the insurance wouldn't answer them yes or no.  We finally consulted an attorney. The lawyer finds out the company never bothered submitting the forms.  But they knew we were waiting- we called weekly.  I went so far as to track down the rep's personal cell phone number and called him after hours at home, on purpose.  And yet, they continued to lie.  WHY?  If they didn't want the business, they could refuse.  I would have simply gone elsewhere.  They knew the products would be paid for.  Why lie and keep a then 2 year old girl without needed equipment?  Why damage their own reputation? (Trust me I told EVERYBODY who would listen about it.)

              Next, are the contractors who say they are interested in my business but aren't.   We need to have some work done the house to make it more accessible to Feisty Pants.  Simple things- a stair glide and a special bath seat put in so we can get her safely upstairs to the  only bathroom and safely bathed.  We have already have some major modifications done.  This work is relatively simple.  And her insurance will happily pay for it.  But you need three bids to do it.  We cannot get three bids to save our lives.   We have tried this several times. The bids must be submitted relatively close together in time. Or you have to start alll over again.  We can never get more written bids than two.  But we call contrator after contractor and they come out time and time again, and then we never hear from them again.  We call, they say they will get back to us, they never do.  We cannot be THAT annoying, that everyone turns down a PAID job.   And if you don't like the idea of a bid where you are tied into the written estimate, don't agree to come out in the first place. This makes no sense.  Forget how much of my time you are wasting, why are you wasting your own?  Honestly guys, if you don't want to do it, tell me.  I'd have more respect for you for telling me to go eff myself than this utterly infuriating lie of "I will let you know asap."  But we are about start trying this one again...

              This last one drives me frigging bugnuts.  It is over simple things her insurance ROUTINELY pays for, repeatedly.  Like her prescriptions.  I have drugstores lie to me and say a particular medication was not paid for by her insurance at all, only to have another pharmacy get it covered no problem.  Or a pharmacy say a medication was not available in a certain form or on back order, only to find a different pharmacy tell me that wasn't true. FP gets what are euphemistically called "youth pants' (think depends or pull ups) which are paid for by insurance.  But it is hard to find many brands in her size.  Our medical supply company is claiming they cannot get them (again the old "back order" demon.)  But the company that makes them says that that is not true.  So who is blowing smoke up  my butt??? And why???  The insurance easily and routinely pays.  Who doesn't want my business???

                Sometimes, I think it's simple human incompetence.  They don't properly fill something out or forget to press send on the computer, and the info gets lost in the ether.   And then they lie to cover their butts when I am calling and politely suggesting they get their ass in gear.  But all they would have to do, is resubmit whatever form, get the job done and I go away happily out of their hair.   And I don't go away so stalling doesn't accomplish anything but a more clipped tone the next time I call.  Or write their supervisor.  So why keep on lying?

                  The only other reason I can think of is a horrible insidious unconscious discrimination against the disabled.  And don't call me paranoid.  It's out there.  Just go look up the statistics on how often the disabled are punished in schools as compared with typical kids.   Or the horror stories of how routinely disabled kids are tortured in the name of "corrective behavior" in special education settings. (Don't believe me? Google Buzz Helmets or Judge Rotenberg Educational Center  - which is still open!!!- or Willowbrook or Pennhurst State Hospital. If they don't give you nightmares then you have no soul.)  That somehow these companies- whose sole reason for existing is to make money by providing these services and medical equipment- are simply not willing to do the thing that makes them their money.  It's like a restaurant refusing to serve food or a store refusing to sell anything.  It makes no sense.  So why do they do it???