No Slacking Here

                      Anndddd now it's summer vacation.   Ahhhh summer, that time of bugs and weather that feels like God's armpit.  Of brain drain and sticky popsicle fingers and kids who are so looking forward to yelling "I'm BORED!" at their parents. Hot, sweaty nights and whiny, cranky days.  I totally get why everyone loves it so much.  (Only 133 days til Halloween!!!) Sigh, at least with lawn mowing, it smells good.  With Feisty Pants, it's really only summer vacay lite.  She goes to school year round.  She has about two and half weeks off now until the summer session starts .  Afterwards, she will have another two and half, three-ish weeks at the end.   We can totally handle this.

                      So, no brain drain for my kid.  I swear. It's only two and half weeks.  We can hit up parks, go to the library, watch only educational youtube videos. I mean she won't have all her therapies (Her therapies are the reason her school has a summer session.)  but we can at least keep her little noggin occupied. We got books on tape for her.  I am sure I can download some Shakespeare or maybe Narnia or even the Dealing with Dragons series.  I also absolutely certain we can youtube some crafty or science experiment ideas on the interwebs.  She has a tie dye kit she got for birthday floating around here too.  It's been a while since I scared the nurse with her having blue and purple dyed fingertips.

                     I mean, c'mon. This isn't my first teenager or my first rodeo.  We have free carousels in the area and places to swim.  Parks with the occasional festival and concert and free movie. Maybe hit the local Y. I'm sure we got summer in the bag. Suck on that all you "good parents" with your silly STEM camps and Disney trips and oh so wholesome summer activities. We'll be home learning circles around your pretty little Instagram posts.  There will be no brain drain.  No lying on the floor in the ac staring at the tv or binging on videogames.  Not for my feisty little Einstein.

                     I mean, it's only the first day and we are off to such a great start.  A breakfast of tater tots and popsicles followed by a home screening of Attack of the Killer Donuts.   Watch in awe, other parents, watch in awe.

                    

My Apologies

              Sigh, so Feisty Pants is having botox shots tomorrow. For the uninitiated, botox is not just about making starlets and trophy wives look like unemotional Vulcans.   It is actually a godsend for those with migraines or spasticity issues like Feisty Pants.   FP actually gets two kinds of botox treatments, one set of shots for her salivary glands (to dry her mouth and control secretions) and one set of shots for the general spasticity in her arms, hands, and legs.   Botox is a very important tool in our arsenal of things to keep Feisty Pants on the straight and narrow, health wise.

              And since they are two sets of shots by two different specialists, we have to stagger having them done.  CAREFULLY stagger, since we don't really want her to go with out the botox in her system doing its job AND you cannot get too much botox all at once. (When she was younger it was done all at once. I am unsure of the reasoning behind the change other than we lost the genius doctor who could do so. Insurance companies can all suck my  #$@%. Vampiric b@#A$%s making money off of the pain and suffering of others.  There is a special place in hell for anyone who sees a human being who is ill or injured and thinks, "Oh Boy!  I can make some effing money there, yessirree!  They'll pay through the nose. " Effing soulless leeches.   Ummmm, what were talking about? oh, right.)

              Anywhooo, the darn botox is very important so usually I am right on top these appointments.   Which we have about every three months.  First, the ENT for salivary shots.  Three months later, the physiatrist for extremities done under anesthesia.  Three months after that the ENT again. Repeat ad infinitum. It's just one of our rhythms of having a feisty one in our lives.  So how the eff did I forget to schedule the clearance for anesthesia appointment with her primary doc?   Thank heavens, the doc (or his office staff, at least) is very accommodating to us and is graciously squeezing us in for the appointment.  And thank heavens, for the secretary of the physiatrist for noticing we had not sent the paperwork and nicely calling to ask. And thank heavens for whoever invented the fax machine so we can just have the paperwork sent and it will get there in time.

              So my apologies to the massage therapist, who I cancelled at the last minute because I am, occasionally, an idiot.   And my apologies to Feisty Pants' nurse, Hotpants, who probably had plans with FP this afternoon and I just commandeered her services for the afternoon rather than wake Goo. And definitely my apologies to new guy Zack, at the doctor's office who had the misfortune of answering the phone to a half crazed parent going, "listen, this is what you're gonna do for me.." because when it comes to Feisty Pants I have no scruples or tact.  Or phone manners, if I'm being honest.

              If it helps any of you guys, I will be paying for my zeal tomorrow at 4:30 am when I crawl my tired, crabby ass outta bed to drive two hours to the appointment for the shots.  You know what they say. Sometimes, if you're really good, Karma lets you watch.