Plagued

             Alright, Universe, WTF?!?  Seriously.  WHAT. THE. HELL.  Feisty Pants is finally back in school.  This was supposed to be her first full week back at school. (Full-ish, it was only a 4 day week, but I will take what I can get.)  She is still cooperating for now.  This honeymoon period won't last forever, you know, Universe.  Soon, she will simply revert back to her ever mischievous super-villain ways and spend her time subverting the system and every adult around her.  You know THAT.  So, why oh why, have given my child the plague AGAIN?  This is simply ridiculous.  She has had at least one tummy bug a month for about four months now.   Has Binghamton suddenly become the landlocked equivalent of a cruise ship?  Have we spawned a hell- mouth, Buffy style, and the demons around here are the demons of gastritis?  Knock it off already.  Geez o petes, Feisty Pants is still on anitibiotics from the last illness.  Seriously, you need a time out, Universe. No more tummy bugs for anyone until you learn to scatter them about more fairly.  Can't you go hit rich people who can afford a day off or Boko Harum or some fundy cult of extremists somewhere?

              Sigh.  At least she is still on antibiotics, so I am hopeful that this will be a minor bump in the road and not a precursor to another pneumonia.  But she is now, yet again, cranky, miserable, and stuck at home with the old farts who want to sadistically bore her to death.  Just ask her. FP will tell you all about how ebil we are.  And she can prove it- Goo made her put on pants this morning and she isn't even going anywhere.  Worst of all, we keep making her EAT when she obviously does not want/need to.   Forget the fact that its only pedialyte (sort of, I make my own- no artificial chemicals that way) and she hasn't thrown that up.  She is sure it will make her nauseous (even if it hasn't yet) and we are only doing to be mean.

             By the way, if you want or need to abuse your sick kiddos with homemade pedialyte (or everyone has the plague and no one wants to go to the store), here are three quick versions to tide you over until you get to the soup and crackers convalescing stage.

Version one- (I like this one but no flavorings are added, FP is tube fed after all.)

1 cup coconut water
1/8 to 1/4 tsp high quality sea salt.
mix well.
That's it- simple and easy peasy.

Version two-(slightly artificial but good for kids who need a flavoring or else they balk.)

1/2 cup hot water

3 and 1/2 cups cool water (or cooled ginger tea)

2 and 1/2 tablespoons sugar
1 tsp jello mix
1/2 tsp sea salt
Mix jello, salt, sugar into hot water until dissolved. Stir into cool water.  This can be kept in fridge for a few days.

Version three-

2 quarts water (again, you could add ginger tea to this)
2 1/2 tsp sugar
1/2 tsp sea salt
1 tsp baking soda
1 cup orange juice
Mix together and serve.  This also can kept in fridge for a few days.