Monday, September 12, 2016

Have Mercy

                 In case you were ever wondering why you should have mercy on strangers, especially strangers with feisty ones in their family, let me tell you about last Thursday. So, Feisty Pants has a severe scoliosis, most likely due to years of spasticity due to the CP.   We are fortunate in that Shriner's Hospital for Children has agreed to do her spinal surgery.  It's going to be a major surgery with a capital M and so there are several clearances we need to get beforehand.  Cardiology, pulmonology and primary care, to be exact.   Unfortunately, the Greater Binghamton Area is not known for its medical subspecialties (read that as not enough pediatric specialists) Syracuse is the closest area with any amount of pediatrics, but frankly, with a few exceptions, I am NOT impressed them on the whole. Especially for pulmonology.  (Read THAT as I almost punched the last pulmonologist who saw Feisty Pants there.) In the words of W.C. Fields, "on the whole, I'd rather be in Philadelphia."
                 Which brings me to last Thursday.   Shriner's, which has several hospitals across the country, has sent us to their Philly  location.  When we explained we had no cardiologist (FP never needed one) and no pulmonologist at the moment (I don't need an assault charge), they said they would send us to St. Christopher's Hospital for those specialties.   Last Thursday was the cardiology clearance appointment (ekg and cardiogram).  This involved, at best, a four hour trip down, a three hour appointment, and another four hours home.  We sleep in shifts, so this meant I was giving up some sleep by getting up early to leave on time.  This also meant Goo was giving up MOST of his sleep because he would be driving when he should be in bed.  We did not get the best circumstances.  Forget the minor traffic jam that made us half an hour late to leave Binghamton (accident on 17) where we got to sit on the overpass near our house and stare at our own neighborhood's rooftops for 30 minutes.   Forget the accident on the turnpike that added another 20 minutes to our trip south.  We got three quarters of the way down and the appointment coordinator was on the line to tell us the cardiologist had to cancel the appointment.  (Her husband had died.  We couldn't even be righteously indignant.) But since the coordinator is suberbly good at her job (and knew we had already driven almost four hours), she was arranging for us to be seen by another cardiologist so we were to drive to St. Christopher's and wait for her to finish arrangements. We which we did, after getting lost in Philly.  And no one wanted to give us directions.  I am sure they were all just deaf and it had nothing to do with my hubby's NY Giants tee shirt he was wearing. (Goo is one those rare men who will ask, mostly because otherwise I use gps and he has to take directions from me- which he hates)   But we made it.  Only to sit their hot cafeteria and wait for an hour and a half to get the call to be seen.  And then, when we went to register their computer system seemed to have a melt down over FP and her insurance and the Shriner's referral and that took an hour to fix.  And this is all before we saw the Doctor.   Who was lovely, and tried to make the appointment go as quickly and smoothly as possible.  But it did indeed, take all afternoon.   We never left the hospital until after six.  Just in time to hit rush hour on the way home.   Oh and it was a hundred degrees in Philly last Thursday, because why not be hot as hell when the day is long and hellish to begin with?

                  So dear reader, when you see a couple who look like crap and probably are sniping bitterly at each other, are carrying way too  much stuff and smell like coffee and angst, and have a feisty one in tow who is probably looking rather fed up too,  please have one of two things, mercy or bail money.   One or the other will definitely be needed.

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